Stepping Into The Life God Has Planned For You
Last night I had a dream that my husband and I were standing on our porch and we were living out west. The grass was yellow and the sky was blue and the mountains were in the background. It was a large porch. He asked me, “Are we going to debate”. But this was his way of saying are we going to lay in the hammock and talk. I looked over to our left and there was a large hammock on the porch. We hugged and laid in the hammock and talked.
That was such a nice dream.
Last night I had a dream that my mom had not died in 2011. She was alive and well and had to pretend that she died.
When I was growing up, my mom had the longest hair in town. I know this because we lived in a small town. Her hair was so long that it got caught between her heel and her shoe when she wore heels.
My mom had breast cancer in her 30s and was in remission until they found it again at the age of 50. But by that time it was stage 4. I won’t go into any of those details, but she eventually lost her hair and when it grew back it was curly. She would laugh and say that all her life she wanted curly hair, and that her long hair was so straight it would never hold a curl. Then she would say, “God finally gave me curly hair”. My mom could find the good in anything even if it were something as small as curls while she was fighting for her life.
Anyway, in the dream, I was about 7 or 8, and my brother was a year older than me and my sister was younger. (Our youngest sibling was not in this dream) But my mom had her long hair, pulled back in a low pony tail. She wore a light blue ribbed sweater top similar to the one in the picture above and jeans I think but they were light blue. I was at one table, and my siblings were at another. She came in and hugged us, all three of us at once. It was very emotional.
We were eating ice cream and I remember seeing my dad come into the room.
Since my mom passed away, my dad has moved on in his life and met someone. He seems happy so we (me and my siblings) are happy for him.
In the dream, he was glad to see my mom but I could see his friend off in the background patiently waiting for him.
I remember then being in a room and there was a huge spider on the floor crawling towards me and I began screaming. My dad was sitting in a chair in the next room, my mom was across from him crocheting and my siblings were at her feet. I think I was at her feet as well but then went to the room.
Our dad has always been very hard on us especially when we were little. Our mom was our safe haven.
After screaming because of the spider, my dad got up like he was trying to be present in our lives, and trying to act concerned. He killed the spider and sat down. My mom could see that he was being artificial and didn’t really care to be there. She didn’t pay any attention to him, she was concerned with our well being. I don’t think my dad was happy, I remember him leaving the room to continue with his life away from us all.
My mom and us were so happy, we hugged again and again, we knew she loved us.
I woke up crying. My husband came into the room and I told him my dream. He hugged me and let me cry as hard as I wanted because I knew my dream was just a dream and she was really gone. He held me until I felt good enough to let him go.
My aunt to Deloise passed away from cancer about eight years ago she was 48. My grandmother died about a year before her she had cancer is well she was in her early 70s and my mom passed away in 2011 of breast cancer.
In my dream I was in a group of people at an outside church event. I was in a group and people were sitting at tables and making name tags. The grass was bright green and there were tall trees and some of their leaves had changed. The wind was blowing it was a nice day. The tags that we were making seemed different they had metal spikes on each side just stick them in the ground.
Some people had glitter on the name plate, some had tiny Pom-Pom fringe outlining them. Some had fuzzy feathers outlining them. There were many ways to decorate them. I was told by the facilitator (a lady who attended my church in North Carolina) that these tags would be for graves of our family members. Everyone was so happy it was something that we could do for our family who had passed away. It was something we could do to show them that we still cared about them.
I then realized it was grave decorating day. Now that is not a real holiday or something that we actually do in real life it was just in my dream. So we looked to our left and there was a grave but it was a mound in the size of a person the ground was not flat and it was decorated with shiny green tensile.
The grave that I saw was a mound in the shape of a human with this all over it.
My Aunt Deloise was there and so was my grandmother. It was like they had never died. And they were making these name tags and grave decorations too.
That was all.
I woke up.
I have had a dream every night for the past week, but can only remember bits and pieces when I wake up. It just seems odd to write about such small dreams. But last night I had two dreams that woke me up and I was so emotional.
In my dream, I was a drug dealer. I was wearing a yellow hoodie, and the hood was up over my head. There was a guy with me and he was wearing a red hoodie and it was over his head. We both had hand guns and we were going through a tunnel that zig zagged underground but came up to the surface.
I looked like this, dark and dirty.
We were in the heart of the tunnels and there were these large yellow barrels in groups in the center with black lids.
I took off the lid to one and with one hand started digging through plastic and ice feeling to the bottom. I lifted several bags out of the barrel but it was drugs, and I was looking for a bag of money. I leave the drugs in these barrels and someone picks up the drugs and leaves a bag of money. So I was looking for the money with one hand and the other hand I had a hand gun that I believe was a silver snub nose revolver like this:
(in reality, this is not my preference, my actual sidearm in real life is a Smith & Wesson M&P Shield 9mm) I was pointing it in the air at the entrances of the tunnels incase anyone came upon me. My friend was pointing his gun (not sure of the kind of gun) at all the entrances of the tunnels as well. There were other people there, but they were not there for us, they ignored us, just like we ignored them. But there were people who knew us and were there to kill us. So we had to be aware of our surroundings. The other people who were there and they were shooting other people and chasing each other. We were in our own group of chasers and shooters. I found a bag with duct tape on it but it was full of little white packets (drugs) and I shoved it back into the barrel, this happened several times until I finally found the money bag and I knew it was mine. Still pointing the guns to the entrance we took off running through the tunnels and people were shooting at us, and we were shooting back. I couldn’t take it so I told myself in my head, “this has to stop, wake up”. So I woke up. I was so thirsty and out of breath. I went to the kitchen to get a water bottle and went back to bed. I said I have to dream about something else, I have to change it. I was so tired that I was lazy about what I changed. Hardly nothing changed.
I went back to sleep and I was standing in front of my grandmothers house but I feel like we had just came from the tunnels. It was still night time. It was so dark, but the lights were on inside the house. I walked into the living room and there were two people. A tall skinny guy with a blue hoodie and a beautiful woman. The woman looked like Tichina Arnold. Exactly like her. It was her.
The woman was wearing a tight, white, ribbed turtle neck shirt and very short tight white shorts. Her legs were long and her white high heel boots came up to her knees. She pulled out a shot gun and aimed it at me, she wanted the money. She started shooting at me. Then I saw a gun, an AK 47 on the floor. I picked it up and it felt like plastic so I threw it on the ground. She kept shooting at me, and the guy started shooting at me and my friend. I kept waiting for my friend to turn against me nd kill me for the money but he didn’t. There was another gun I picked up and it fell apart. The last one I got off of a shelf and I pointed it at the woman and started shooting. They ran down the hallway and we continued shooting after them. We killed them both and my friend told me to go to the airport and get away cause the authorities would be looking for me and come after me. So I left.
I had a gray shoulder bag and a bright yellow rolling bag going through the airport.
I remember being in a hotel in Paris. Sitting in a chair at an accent table at the window. I could see the Eiffel Tower out the window.
I got a phone call so I answered my cell phone. I do not know what was being said on the other end of the phone, but I said, “OK, I’ll be right there”.
The next thing I know I was going through TSA in the airport with my bags and as I walked through the doors, there stood my dad and his brother (my uncle) in Correctional Officer uniforms. My dad said, “I can’t believe she came back”. They took me into custody and walked me through the doors. I was in shock, but I didn’t resist.
When we got outside it was night time. I could feel the cold night air on my skin and could see the street lamps in the distance, it was so real. I knew I had woken up and I was no longer dreaming. I looked around and there were 2 cars. My dad and uncle got into one car it was a gold convertible Lincoln Continental like this one:
In the back seat there was a couple from the Bible College I use to work at. They looked at me and I felt ashamed. I said in my head, what will they say now? April is a convicted felon that use to work at our Bible College? The couple is a married couple and they looked at me with this embarrassing look, as if they were not only embarrassed for me, but of me. I could feel the shame I began to tear up.
I looked at the other car and it was old, it was a 1970 Plymouth Sport Fury 383 V8 my brother was driving it so I got in the back seat of that car. It was red like this.
I remembered the money and I didn’t even know how much money it was. So I asked my brother and he said the money was stolen and I took it. I said, “How much money was it”? He said, “1.5 million”. I knew that robbing a bank is a federal crime and that would get me 20 years. So I thought about being separated from my husband for 20 years, and I became scared, but I knew I didn’t rob a bank. So I thought about 5 years and I looked up at the ceiling of the car and seeing the dark gray interior I started to cry. I began to pray, “Oh God, dear God please don’t let this be happening, please!” And when I looked back down, I saw the ceiling fan in our bedroom and tears were in my eyes and I was almost out of breath because in the dream I had become frantic. I was so glad it was a dream I rolled over and hugged my husband from behind and thanked God.
I went back to sleep and I began dreaming again.
I walked into a bedroom and there were 2 single beds, one was for me and the couple from the Bible College was in one bed and they were both awake. I was with someone and I looked back at the bed and saw the woman sit up and say something to me. I wasn’t paying attention to what she was saying I just knew she had huge rollers in her hair and she looked like a different woman. She was a different woman. I looked at the person who came into the room with me and I said, “That’s not Mrs. Mills, who is that?” The person said, “Mr. Mills is suing your son for something he said and he divorced his wife and married this lady.”
The next day Mr. Mills came up to me, he had a bandage on his forehead and was pointing his finger in my face and said, “Your son made an inaccurate statement. He said he was getting scholarship money from the Bible College to label all the movies on campus, and I’m suing him!”
I pictured my son so proud to be working at the Bible College like I did, and my heart hurt for him. Mr. Mills walked away angry.
That was the end.
My husband woke me up
Photos: tunnel yellow drums revolver Tichina Arnold Eiffel Tower Car Linconln Continental
Names have been changed to protect their privacy.
Ok, lately I have been having these little dreams, but last night it was a more normal dream. Last night I dreamed that I lived in an apartment that looked a gym. It was the size of a gym, like the one in the picture below.
The floors were just like this gym except there were no lines, or markings. The hard wood floors and walls were the color of butterscotch so everything had a warm yellow hue. Now looking at this picture above, where the goal is, in my dream that was a large black door. There were 2 sheer curtains one on each side of the apartment making 3 sections with a hallway to the door. Everything was separated by sheer curtains. On each side of the room there was a bedroom, bathroom, and living room. There was a kitchen at the end that stretched out the length of the room. I couldn’t find any pictures on the internet so I drew what it looked like.
My roommate was a tall thin strawberry blonde, with shoulder length hair and milky white skin. She had left for work. I went to her side of the apartment and started going through her dresser pulling out clothes and throwing them in the air and floor. They were all sheer beautiful fabrics. My roommate came in and said, “stop going through my things”. I knew it was wrong, I’m not sure why I was doing it, I said, “ok” and grabbed my purse and went to work.
I worked in a bank. All tellers (I was a teller) sat at a long table. The cold room had furniture that was like a classroom with short gray carpet. In front of the table of tellers was a half circle table where all the bank managers sat. The room had gray walls and was dark and there was a spotlight in the middle of the room between the managers and tellers. Everyone wore black, black suits, black dress suits, black pant suites. All the women were conservatively dressed, no cleavage showing, the necks of the dresses and tops were high. A couple women wore short large pearl necklaces with hints of gold. I was a teller, so I was sitting at the table, a lady came up to me and handed me her card and said “there’s nothing in there, it won’t give me any money.” I said, “Then you have no money.” She looked at me and said, “No, there’s money in there, it just says there isn’t.” I took the card and asked the lady to follow me. Directly behind me was a large white staircase that curved up.
As I walked up the stairs, there were desks along the way. So on the second step I looked to the right and there was a desk facing me. All along the stairs there were desks so you could stop on the stairs and get help.
So I stopped at the third desk and gave the lady her card and said, “It’s not working.” She took the card and punched in some numbers on a calculator (there was no computer) She ripped off a piece of tape from the calculator and handed it to me. “This is the balance”. I handed it to the lady and the numbers were $20,324,583. (I don’t know how I remembered that number I didn’t see any cents).
By the time I got to the bottom of the stairs, the managers were all whispering to each other. One of the tellers wore a pink flowing sun dress like this one:
Every time she had a customer, as soon as the customer went away the teller walked up the stairs to the white platform at the top. There was an ATM machine at the top and she would go to it then back to her seat at the table. The managers were whispering because they had suspicion that she was stealing.
As this went on, I walked up the stairs to the platform. When I got there the wall at the end was an archway that lead outside. There was no furniture, just the large archways.
As I went through the archway the platform continued. I sat on the edge with my legs dangling off the side. I was about 100 feet up. and in the distance there was a stadium and the sun was setting behind it. The sky was blue for peach and pink clouds. I heard someone. When I looked over there was a large flower cart that someone was rolling toward me. They were not ready made bouquets, it was a cart of flowers like flowers at Michael’s where you choose the flowers and arrange them yourself. I reached up and started choosing flowers. All the flowers I chose were long flowers, and they were red roses, white carnations and blue delphinium perennial flowers. I began arranging the flowers in a large white distressed flower pot.
As I arranged the flowers and the sun went down, I crossed my ankles and took a deep breath.
That was it. My husband woke me up.
Pictures I used:
Gym, staircase, pink dress, archway white distressed flower pot
I had 2 dreams last night. I’m having trouble remembering the first one, but the second one goes like this.
My sister was shot by a friend who broke into our house. I went upstairs to tell my parents and my dad didn’t believe me he said she was alright.
In this dream, my sister had the face of my youngest daughter. The person who shot her in the side seemed very angry and looked like an extremely overweight bald guy with no shirt. It was raining and was about 11pm and there was lightening. The “friend” was wet. I saw the hole in my sister’s side, it was black and there were powder burns on her shirt. When I went upstairs my dad had the face of my husband and he had been beaten up. His right eye was swollen shut and it was purple and his top lip was busted with a huge cut that was open an bleeding, and he was wet too like he had been outside. I had the feeling he got beat up by the friend down stairs with the gun. My mom was just a woman, she looked like a stranger, no one I knew, but she had long dark hair and was wearing a nighty that was way too young for her. My dad was trying to calm me down to no avail.
In my mind I knew my sister was fine. It looked like a bad wound, but she didn’t seem hurt.
Earlier yesterday I went to the doctor and I was told I needed to go for some tests. Maybe that was reflected in my dream. (My sister being hurt, but knowing she was fine)???
I did have a dream last night but the only thing I can remember is dreaming about dark brown cabinets in a dark room, not a kitchen, but they looked like kitchen cabinets. They had a design all the way around each door but there were no handles. I also remember the name Clegg Trey. I don’t know anyone by this name although there was someone I knew with the name Tray with an “a”. I have been giving characters names in my story and changing names as well and that was something I was working on the past couple of days and I keep forgetting that I changed this one character’s name so I keep writing it wrong. But it wasn’t something that was on my mind before I went to bed, or even hours before bed, it was something that I was working on days before and a little yesterday morning. It is amazing how we can dream about something so vividly that is deep in our subconscious.
What I wanted to talk about was one of the many projects I have my hands in besides my book. I have not even began editing so that’s why I haven’t written much about it yet, some things are still moving and changing a little. Which makes me wonder; if the things you write about actually happened would the book be considered a work of fiction or non-fiction? I guess if it is mostly true it would be non-fiction, which means you’d need to add more fiction elements to make it non fiction. But how do you even go about doing that? This is one of the many things I am learning along my writing journey.
On with the project I wanted to talk about. I wanted to crochet a coat for this winter. I am originally from North Carolina and this will be my first winter in Pennsylvania. It doesn’t get really cold in NC, this week there has been almost a 7 to 10 degree difference and it rains more here, I LOVE THE RAIN!!! So I wanted to make a coat to start wearing in October when I could really start feeling a chill. In NC October is a hot month, and not just hot, but muggy. So I am looking forward to making this. I wanted to do something fairly easy like granny squares
So I found a great pattern on YouTube. https://youtu.be/U6PwfShifu8 This is Annoo Crochet Designs and I think she is my new favorite. I have made 30 of the 47 crochet squares and I’m getting excited. This yarn is Red Heart Unforgettable and the color is Sunrise.
Last night I dreamed that I went to sleep and had a dream. I dreamed about sewing. I was sitting at my sewing machine and picked up the thread to make sure I had the right thread for my project. The name of the thread was Coats & Clark. I looked at it and said Tim Coats created this. In my dream I woke up and ran to my laptop to search the internet for the creator. In my dream he really was the creator. I was excited that I knew in my dream a name and woke up to research it and it was true.
I woke up this morning and searched the internet. Tim Coats didn’t create thread. I didn’t know where I got that name. I did take out my material yesterday and start a sewing project.
Sunday night I had a dream, and I woke up to go to the bathroom. To make sure I would remember the dream I talked about it to myself, naming out the colors I saw, and the people and what they were doing and naming out where everything was and then I said to myself, ok, I know I’m going to have another dream so I need to get ready. I did have another dream, but when I woke up, I didn’t remember either of them. But last night I had a dream.
I dreamed that I was in a Walmart and I was with a young girl in my family. In real life, she is about 27 but in the dream, she was 13 and she had on a light pink coat, and her hair was tied back in a ponytail and she had a Walmart bag in each hand. We had bought chicken breasts and we were returning them. They were in ziplock bags, but there were bags full of fried chicken legs, but when I looked at them she had gone through and eaten all the fried skin off all the chicken. There were maybe 10 grocery bags full of chicken and they were just in the bags, not in ziplock bags. I looked at her and said, “We can’t get anything for this, you have been eating on the chicken. I had calculated that we could have gotten about $2,000 for all the chicken we had, I’m sure that was an exaggerated figure, but after everything, we were only getting about $200. She was still chewing as she held bags in each hand.
Then I woke up
I had a dream last night but the only thing I remember is how it woke me up. There was a scream that woke me up. It was sharp and it was a sound, not a voice like you would hear in a movie. I woke up panting, scared and out of breath. At the time, I knew what I dreamed, but I went back to sleep an when I woke up this morning I couldn’t remember what it was about, but I remember that scream.
Stepping Into The Life 
